We weren't officially free to leave our snow entrapment until today when the plows finally came. While we had our cars dug out, our spot in relation to the exit was completely blocked by a 7 foot mountain, which was also about 7 feet deep and hard packed snow. That means we were "trapped" for 3 days. That was enough to trigger the stuffing out of me, apparently. The caged in feeling and helplessness (because we dug and dug and dug and we still weren't quite in the clear) and depending on someone else....whoa!!!! Quite the lesson in letting go and I did not rise up to the occasion. I find myself today almost "should-ing", but I've stopped that in trade of loving myself through it. That's the only thing there is to do, especially knowing when our past dictates the cycle of abuse the only way through it without repeat is finding new ways to cope and self love.
Today, I am grateful for a short ride to the store to pick up a couple items and time outside sledding, building snow families, and playing with our neighbor friends. I'm grateful for fun messes and keeping my life moving forward. Small steps are better than no steps.
Gratefully yours,
Joanna Rose
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