Posted on September 30, 2013
Giving Yourself Goodies!
I used to struggle with this one quite a bit. I'd be feeling down and reach out to a friend to help me out of a slump, or reach for my favorite treat to cheer me up because "I deserve to treat myself". Or maybe I was feeling sad, but I'd remember that in a month's time I'd be away on vacation, so I'd keep that in mind to bait myself forward. Any of these sound familiar?
The problem with living this way is that all of these "fixes" are temporary. What if you couldn't reach your friend or you're snowed in and can't go get "treats"? What happens if your next vacation is a year away? All of these outside influences are temporary and it is for that reason that we set ourselves up for failure when we solely rely on them for our happiness.
What does "giving myself goodies" mean?
It means instead of looking to outside sources to make you happy (such as food, shopping sprees, friends and/or family, situations, glass of wine, etc) you make yourself happy from within! Believe me when I say it can be a difficult transition when you're used to looking "out there" to feel good, but when making the realization that it can only be given to yourself and that can never be compromised it leads to feeling giddy....like a kid on Christmas morning kind of giddy! It's so freeing and so empowering to remember that we affect our lives, no one else. We can choose to be happy and we can get ourselves there with our own internal resources.
Here's a few tips on what helps get me there. Maybe they will work for you and maybe not, but as you continue on your path to self discovery I highly recommend you start making your own list:
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Awareness remembering that we're the only ones responsible for our happiness is key! That and be aware of your self talk. If you're being mean to yourself all the time, it's no wonder you're unhappy (no calling yourself lazy, stupid, and definitely no "shoulds").
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Visualizing what areas of our life would we like to effect change and start to visualize what that would look like as if it's already done.
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Let your inner creativity flow feeling the urge to write or to get your hands dirty in some finger paint? DO IT!!! Do not judge what comes out, just do it and have fun. Not sure what you want to get into? What activities did you enjoy when you had less responsibility and took more time for you? Start again...
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Give yourself a hug! Yes, really.
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Recall what makes you unique. What are your talents, gifts, or skills? You
have them, so start making a list.
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